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Becks In Time

by | 22nd, March 2004

‘SOME ideas work well on paper. Other ideas work well on the screen. And some others work as well as a one-armed Scouse roofer with piles.

Becks and a friend pose as Samson and Deliah

How Beckham Back In Time came to be made is a programme in itself, and one more interesting than the main event.

We cut to scene one of TV Execs Exposed and see the young man with interesting square-rimmed glasses writhing in his bed.

In his dreams he sees David Beckham. But Becks is not clad in the strip of Real Madrid or England, rather the panoply of the heroic knight of yore.

Just as Day-vid is preparing to do battle with the green knight or a mighty dragon, he’s transported to ancient Rome, where he’s now a charioteer.

The TV exec wriggles and moans in ecstasy as Day-vid changes uniform to be an army officer and then a matador in 1740s Spain.

This is a fantasy to end them all. Our TV exec has managed to combine the historical bent of Simon Schama with the titillation of Channel X and the best of Sky Sports to produce a TV show for all ages and all men.

It’s perfect. He reaches for his pad, the one he keeps on the bedside table in times of such great inspiration, and jots down the idea.

And then he wakes and can make no sense of what he’s written. But the show gets made by the BBC anyhow, with a look-alike as Becks and fronted by Nick Knowles.

And it gets broadcast on BBC3 tonight at 9:30.

And then we all wake up and find out it’s been a terrible dream. Or do we…?’



Posted: 22nd, March 2004 | In: Celebrities Comment | TrackBack | Permalink