Anorak News | A Sinner’s Tale

A Sinner’s Tale

by | 2nd, April 2004

‘LAST week, we reported on how many people who had gone to watch Mel Gibson’s The Passion Of The Christ has been changed by the experience.

A lost sheep

People with headaches had found that watching a man getting flogged for two hours is a better cure than any number of paracetamol.

A bank robber who saw the film apparently turned himself into police and admitted that it was he who stole $25,000 from the First Union bank in Palm Beach Gardens, Fla, in December 2001.

And a hairdresser and former soft-porn actress was so moved with religious fervour that she confessed to the National Enquirer that she had enjoyed a torrid affair with Gibson in 1988.

Unlike Gibson in his flagellation fantasy, we will spare you the graphic details except to report that the actor apparently never mentioned Jesus, God or religion to Diana Alouise.

‘We drank like a fish,’ she recalls, ‘and made love more than 20 times. And he never once used a condom.’

Having established that Gibson is a good Catholic in at least one aspect, Alouise (her 30 pieces of silver residing happily in her purse) reveals that she feels bad about what happened now.

‘I think adultery is wrong,’ she says. ‘It is a sin. And Mel was wrong to commit that sin.’

Yes, but as the Bible says, there is more rejoicing in the Kingdom of Heaven over one sheep that was lost and now is found than over 99 that were never lost.’

Posted: 2nd, April 2004 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink