Anorak News | Sleeping Partners

Sleeping Partners

by | 13th, May 2004

‘FRED Elliot’s plans to treat himself to a tasty Thai are about to backfire horribly as his Oriental Flower turns out to be slightly more home grown than he’d hoped.

Weatherfield rock

Fellow Square Dealer Dennis has helped Fred to post his details on “t’internet” in the hope of meeting a potential wife (ideally one who’s deaf and blind).

Fred’s taking it very seriously and is even trying to lose weight in a bid to woo Mrs Elliot the Fourth. Unfortunately for him though, he’s going to lose pounds of a different nature, as ‘friend’ Dennis is setting Fred up with a Manchester market stall trader called Stacey.

“I’ve found us another one!” he told her. “And this one’s loaded.” Poor Fred, he can’t even order a mail-order bride properly; still at least the postage will be cheaper.

Elsewhere in Weatherfield, the path of true love is proving just as rocky for others. Candice’s new boyfriend Tim seems to be as illusive as a Victoria Beckham hit single. He did graciously agree to turn up to Maria’s 21st birthday party but he stayed only long enough to charm Candice into bed and then left so quickly he must have left skid marks on the duvet.

Janice will also be looking for a quick exit later this week, when she wakes up in bed with Les. Janice agreed to meet Les for a drink to celebrate their divorce, a drink Les took to mean a date.

He’d ushered Chesney and Kirk round to Fizz’s and put on his best pulling gear: the infamous leopard skin jacket that looks like a Showaddywaddy cast-off. Janice is clearly suffering from some form of brain damage after the factory fire as she not only agreed to go back to Les’s but ended the night by kissing him.

“I’m confused,” Janice told Karen the next day. More like “I’m mad.” Janice has been impressed by Les’s kindness to Chesney, taking him in after Cilla left.

“I’ll bring him up like me own,” Les told Janice. As Chesney has started to lie, steal and bunk off school, it seems like Les is sticking to his word.

The biggest love shock of the week, however, was for Katy when Karl confided in her that he’d been sleeping with Todd. Karl had got drunk at Maria’s party and told Katy that he was seeing a man soon to be married.

“When can I meet him?” asked Katy, eyes lighting up at the prospect of some gossip. “You already have,” Karl replied, eyeing up Todd.

Katy, as Sarah Lou’s prospective step-mother (try explaining that one to the kids), is determined that Todd does the right thing.

“If you don’t tell her, I will,” she raged at him. “Yer just don’t understand how hard it is,” Todd told her. “When I’m with Sarah I want her, but when I’m with Karl it’s different,” he continued, showing about as much backbone as a Labour backbencher.

Sarah Lou is so far blissfully unaware of what’s going on around her. “Todd’s my rock,” she said to Katy. “And we’re so lucky to have a friend like Karl. We have so much in common.”

If only you knew, love.’

Posted: 13th, May 2004 | In: Strange But True Comment | TrackBack | Permalink