Anorak News | Sophie’s Choice

Sophie’s Choice

by | 21st, May 2004

‘WITH wife Victoria checking his phone bills and intercepting his text messages, David Beckham will have to put pen to paper if he wants to cast his vote in today’s big debate – ‘Slim Lass or Hourglass?’

‘I prefer Nuts readers actually’

Shocked by pictures of a stick-thin Sophie Dahl, the Sun asks its readers which they prefer – shapely women or super-slim girls.

Loaded editor Martin Daubney (a representative in the Sun’s eyes of those of us with XY chromosomes) insists that blokes like women with a bit of meat on them.

“Big bums and heaving breasts send us into meltdown,” he says, “but heroin chic leaves us cold turkey.”

Good news for Vanessa Feltz, who we can now expect to see as Miss April in next year’s Loaded calendar, but not so for poor old Posh.

A picture of her on the front page of this morning’s Mail is not so much heroin chic as Belsen freak.

The paper says that for all the show of unity between the Beckhams, both were constantly in tears.

“Victoria has lost more than a stone,” it adds, “and has told friends she finds it impossible to eat because she is so depressed.”

If she’s looking for sympathy, however, we advise her not to turn to Martin Daubney for a shoulder to cry on.

Back in the Sun, he winds up the Slim Lass v Hourglass debate with this advice to Sophie Dahl – “get a nice meal and you’ll be tons more attractive”.

Not only that, but you might even snare a Loaded reader as a boyfriend…’

Posted: 21st, May 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink