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Anorak News | Creature Comforts

Creature Comforts

by | 26th, May 2004

‘A RUSSIAN circus is attempting to overcome its financial difficulties by renting out its animals to members of the public.

‘Ok, Bubbles, this time I want you to only pretend like you’re eating a banana…’

For £100 you get a giraffe, £85 buys a camel, and so on. All good stuff, but there have been objections.

Self-appointed critics – or interfering busybody killjoys, to give them their proper title – are claiming that the zoo is lavishing “luxuries” on the creatures.

The Mirror reports that gorillas have had TVs installed in their cages, to allow them to watch documentaries on the great apes of the world (and gorilla porn from Amsterdam, no doubt).

Rumours reached a peak last week with the story that one gorilla was looking into the possibility of purchasing a majority share in Liverpool Football Club.

We are pleased to confirm that he has confirmed that he has no such intentions, although he refuses to explain his recent meetings with Richard Desmond.’



Posted: 26th, May 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink