Anorak News | Family Affairs

Family Affairs

by | 11th, June 2004

‘THERE wasn’t a dry eye in Weatherfield this week as little Billy Platt was buried after his brief 24 hours as a cast member.


The sight of his little shoebox-sized coffin in the back of the hearse caused even hardened hearts like Blanche’s to crack. Sarah has told Todd to keep away from the funeral but, when he turned up anyway, she didn’t have any strength left to fight him.

Even Gail showed some sympathy with the weeping Todd and agreed that he and Eileen could say goodbye to Billy at his graveside.

Martin decided to take matters into his own hands, however, and to mete out some old school Northern justice. When he ran into Karl at Weatherfield General, he started laying into him.

“That’s for Sarah and the baby,” he grunted as he booted Karl in the stomach – proving that an intimate knowledge of anatomy isn’t just good for nursing people back to health but also for putting them into comas.

Karl decided not to press charges, but Martin was still suspended from his job anyway; although what he actually does other than loiter in corridors and drink tea has never been really made clear.

Martin has offered to take David camping for a few days to try and get the family back to normal and so that he can avoid Katy, who’s taken to practically stalking him. The couple split up when Katy let slip that she’d known about Karl and Todd for ages.

“Yer not in the playground now Katy!” fumed Martin, “It’s not a game of who fancies who.” Much to dad Tommy’s delight, Katy has moved back home, but Katy’s determined to win Martin back. “I can’t live without ‘im, mam,” she whined.

Unfortunately, she tried to do this by sending him a ‘Happy Birthday Granddad’ card before finding out that Billy had died. Not surprisingly, Martin was less than impressed. At least he didn’t kick her head in though.

New character Danny provided some much-needed light relief this week. In under a week he’d renamed Karen and Janice “bloshy and lippy”, bedded Sunita and got more work out of the factory girls than Mike had in a year.

Danny boy wasn’t smiling for long, however, as his wife turned up unexpectedly, just as he was letting Sunita in for second helpings. “That’ll be the pizza delivery girl,” he told his wife, earning himself a deserved slap from Sunita.

Sunita’s set to deliver up something altogether more worrying in nine months from now – it’ll be interesting to see how he explains that away.

There’s more bed-hopping going on in Weatherfield as Bev and Charlie betray Shelly by sleeping together again. Shelly had stood Charlie up to go out with Sunita so Bev decided to ply Charlie with free drinks.

“I’d never stand you up,” she purred into his ear.

No, Bev always prefers to do it lying down.’

Posted: 11th, June 2004 | In: Strange But True Comment | TrackBack | Permalink