Anorak News | Going Nowhere

Going Nowhere

by | 6th, July 2004

‘BEFORE we close the bedroom door on Posh and Becks and leave them to love and lust after each other under the privacy of their own duvet, we bring you news to shock.

Captain Kidd had already been told off for doing wheelies down the runway

It seems that it was a good job scribes followed the Beckhams to Morocco after all because, had they not, we might not have known where they were and so not been able to rescue them when air travel grinds to a halt.

The Express reports that members of the TGWU at 17 UK airports, including Heathrow and Gatwick, have voted by a majority of four to one in favour of taking industrial action.

The Mirror has seen the news (‘SUMMER HELLIDAY’) and says that unless the baggage-handlers and check-in staff get more money they will walk out.

The paper claims that workers are ‘furious’ at the £2.5% pay rise being offered by their employers. As a spokesperson for the TGWU says: ‘It’s not even enough for a pint of beer.’

But it is enough. Indeed, in holiday hotspots the tabled offer of £1 a day before tax can buy a large bottle of gin, a packet of fags and one of those stuffed donkeys with a hat on.

And that’s good news for the stranded millions in their timeshares and hotels.

As it is for Posh and Becks, who may find themselves stuck in Morocco while the strikers protest.

As such, we hope the strike proves to be a long one. Posh and Becks need time together to heal the rift and, if the strikers can just hold out for, say, a couple of years, they should be happy again.

And so shall we…’

Posted: 6th, July 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink