Anorak News | Mon Dieu

Mon Dieu

by | 7th, July 2004

‘AS ever, the headlines are dominated by Wayne Rooney, who, according to the Sun, has been offered £50,000 a week to stay at Everton.

Live feed from our Tower Bridge webcam

But the paper also says that the tabled five-year deal, worth a not-inconsiderable £12.5m to the boy, may not be good enough to stop the 18-year-old from leaving the club.

Despite him saying that he doesn’t want the player, the Sun still thinks Chelsea’s new boss Jose Mourinho could move for Rooney, as could Manchester United, Inter Milan, and, if they get the money, we suppose, Scunthorpe, Halifax and the Crouch End Vampires.

However, the Mail sees United as the frontrunners in this race to secure the signature of England’s brightest rising talent.

And the Express looks at another altogether more interesting football transfer.

News is that Glenn Hoddle has applied, via fax, to become the new manger of…France.

While we chortle at the thought of Hoddle gathering the likes of Zinedine Zidane and Thierry Henry in a huddle and showing them how much more skilful he is than them, the Express explains things further.

The better news for Frenchmen everywhere is that the paper is of the mind that Hoddle will not get the nod.

With Jean Tigana and Laurent Blanc among the favourites to replace Jacques Santini – who, in a neat fit, has just stepped into Hoddle’s old boots at Spurs – Hoddle’s chances of success are slim.

Of course, God is on Hoddle’s side and, since the old creator jinks and shimmies in mysterious ways, the thought of Hoddle doing for France what he did for England and Spurs lingers.

But one thing in sport that is decided is England’s chance of winning cricket’s triangular NatWest Series.

Yesterday, the West Indies defeated England and so booked their place in Saturday’s final against New Zealand.

England’s defeat, although not remarkable in itself (England have won only three of their last ten one-day matches), is notable for the performances of Andrew Flintoff and Andrew Strauss, who both scored centuries.

Flintoff and Strauss, trudging home from Lord’s yesterday, must have wondered what on earth they need to do for England to win a match – and what that loud humming noise was coming from the West End.

The Express reveals that the din was the roar of F1 engines, as London mayor Ken Livingstone enthralled London’s tired commuters by blocking the roads around Piccadilly with a display of car power.

Ken may not like cars (he prefers cabs), but he is keen to secure a Grand Prix for London by 2008 (see Broads).

“We want the golden trio,” says Ken, “the start of the Tour de France, the Grand Prix and the Olympics.”

It’s a great plan. But why not just combine all three and have runners, cyclists and racing drivers do battle on the roads at once?

And Ken’s heard our call. Look, they’ve started already…’

Posted: 7th, July 2004 | In: Back pages Comment | TrackBack | Permalink