Anorak News | Not If, But Sven

Not If, But Sven

by | 28th, July 2004

‘SVEN Goran Eriksson’s fate will be settled in eight days’ time when the FA board sits down for an extraordinary meeting to decide whether the England coach lied about his affair with Faria Alam.

‘I’ve never shagged a German’

But the Swede would be forgiven for starting to pack his Cuban heels and looking round for alternative employment if he reads today’s headlines.

“DOOMED” is the Express’s verdict, saying Eriksson will be left to carry the can after the FA cleared its chief executive Mark Palios of any wrongdoing.

“On The Brink” is the Mail’s headline, suggesting that the decision to absolve Palios “could be construed as a deliberate attempt to further alienate Eriksson”.

And the Sun has even lined up Sir Bobby Robson and Trevor Brooking to step into the breach “as soon as they have axed their once-a-night boss”.

[The paper typically appears far more upset by Sven’s lack of stamina in the bedroom than by any lies he may have told his employers.]

You may remember that on Monday the Sun was throwing around Steve McClaren’s name as Eriksson’s replacement, but now we learn that Middlesbrough might refuse to release him.

And that means 71-year-old Robson will become a caretaker manager for the friendly against Ukraine alongside Brooking, director of football development.

The one good thing about this whole boring saga is that it has knocked that other boring saga – Patrick Vieira’s mooted move to Real Madrid – off the back pages.

But all the papers are this morning in agreement that the French midfielder will quit Arsenal for the Spanish capital in the next few days.

The source of the story is Spanish sports paper Marca, which is pretty well the official Real Madrid newsletter and which claims that the 28-year-old has already agreed personal terms.

The Mirror insists that Madrid will now make an official approach to Arsenal in the next couple of days for the player valued by the Sun at £35m.

As English football once again descends into farce, English cricket is on the up and up.

The Sun says Monday’s victory over the West Indies at Lord’s has confirmed the team’s position as the No.2 side in the world behind the might Australians.

And it says coach Duncan Fletcher – “a sort of Sven Goran Eriksson who wins, keeps his trousers on and gets a 20th of his salary” – must take much of the credit.’

Posted: 28th, July 2004 | In: Back pages Comment | TrackBack | Permalink