The Age Of The Cleavage
‘WOMEN, according to a Good Housekeeping survey, put more passion into their housework than their love lives…but the men who run Fleet Street are as sex-obsessed as ever.
‘Me again!’ |
Jennifer Ellison’s breasts make a third appearance in as many days this morning as the Mirror ushers in ‘the age of the cleavage’.
This comes as quite a surprise to seasoned tabloid watchers here at Anorak Towers – we were under the impression that every day was ‘the age of the cleavage’.
But the Mirror claims to have spotted a new trend, with the best of the breast on display at this week’s various award ceremonies.
And, to illustrate its point, the paper has pictures of the main offenders – Zoe Lucker, Sarah Manners and Lucy Pargeter at the TV Quick Awards, Victoria Silvstedt and Rachel Stevens at the GQ Awards, Amy Winehouse and Jamelia at the Mercury Music Awards and Jordan just being Jordan.
‘This season, boobs are everywhere,’ the paper says. ‘Not just on the red carpet or at glitzy celeb hotspots. Not just on the beaches, bars and nightclubs.
‘You can’t step outside the front door without a bosom pointing straight at you.’
Nor can you open a newspaper without suffering the same fate – this morning’s Star has Abi Titmuss’s silicone-enhanced cleavage emblazoned across its front page.
And inside a scantily-clad Rachel Hunter introduces yet another sex survey, this time suggesting that women who wear stockings have more sex than those who wear tights.
‘They are far more likely to dress up for nookie sessions,’ reports the paper, ‘are more up-front about starting sex romps and have more quick flings.’
But do they do the housework?
According to the Star, Abi Titmuss, Rachel Hunter, Victoria Silvstedt, Britney Spears and Kylie Minogue all swear by stockings.
But, if the Good Housekeeping poll (reported in this morning’s Mail) is right, then two of the five will actually get more pleasure from cleaning than from making love.
A disappointment to all those men who have been salivating over images of Kylie with a feather duster…’
Posted: 9th, September 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink