Anorak News | Tour De France

Tour De France

by | 9th, September 2004

‘JACQUES Chirac is famous for being able to do in one minute what other mere mortals can only do in 15 or even 20.

‘Beat that, Sir Ralph Halpern’

Time to the French President is a precious commodity that must not be wasted. There are only so many minutes in the day, as they are only so many willing secretaries in Paris.

This means that his life is run to a fixed and tight schedule and, when the great motivator sleeps, he must do so for the full duration of his allotted time or his world (and therefore the world) will be thrown out of kilter.

So when, the Times reports, he boarded a flight from Paris to Sochi on the Black Sea for a breakfast date with Russian premier Vladimir Putin, he was alarmed.

If he feel asleep as he normally would, the jet would reach its destination a full two hours before he was ready to wake.

So either Putin would have to wait on the tarmac for his guest to stir or else Chirac would have to take a detour to make the flight the required length.

Sensibly, he chose option B, and ordered the pilot of Le Presidential Airbus to make a lap of France.

First, Chirac headed for the Channel Islands before making a hard right and flying an extra 1,200 miles past Nantes, taking in the rarefied air of Toulouse, Bourges before a second pass over Paris.

The operating cost of this grand tour is put at five figures, while the paper reminds readers that because the plane flew at 18,000ft – half the normal cruising altitude – it consumed 30% more fuel.

However, it was all worth it because we hear that the President enjoyed a full night’s slumber and was ready to face the challenges ahead.

And as soon as he’s had breakfast, he’ll get right on with whatever (or whomever) they may be…’

Posted: 9th, September 2004 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink