Anorak News | Jam Today

Jam Today

by | 30th, September 2004

‘ONE day and two messages to Tony Blair.

‘Didn’t somebody shoot John Lennon?’

The first came from Kenneth Bigley, who, in an Independent article entitled “THE AGONY OF KENNETH BIGLEY”, is heard addressing the British people and their leader.

Seen shackled behind bars and dressed in an orange jump suit, Bigley says that there has been no progress in the effort to save his life.

“Tony Blair is lying,” says he. He is lying when he says he is negotiating. He is not negotiating.”

Little new in the concept of Blair being a liar. Over in the Telegraph, Tory leader Michael Howard says that the Prime Minister lied over Iraq.

If Howard can prove his claim to the Commons, the Telegraph is right to say that the PM would have to resign.

But Blair is an experienced and wily operator. And, in any case, he hasn’t lied over Bigley, having vowed not to negotiate with terrorists.

Even if he did talk to them, what form would negotiations take? What Bigley’s captors want is so extreme it has no hope of being granted. Better if they asked for a million euros than for their warped vision of Iraq to be made real.

In any case, Blair was too busy listening to the other message being directed his way.

After Brown’s bluster and Blair’s non-apology, the Labour delegates at the Brighton conference finally got to the main act.

Ladies and gentlemen, militants and socialites, pro-hunt demonstrators and dead horses, we give you Bo…noooo!

And with that the Irish popstar took to the stage to tell the delegates about his drive to lift impoverished Africa up the political agenda.

“I’m fond of Tony Blair and Gordon Brown,” said the Irishman. “They are kind of the John and Paul of the global development stage, in my opinion.”

(That’s not the John Paul, as in the Pope, but John and Paul, as in The Beatles.)

“But the point is, Lennon and McCartney changed my interior world – Blair and Brown can change the real world.”

A picture of Tony “Lennon” Blair and Gordon “McCartney” Brown meeting with Bono after his speech show the pair beaming with pride.

Here is what being a top politician is really all about. Here was Bono talking to them.

But before Tony gets his autograph – for the children, of course – and whips out his “axe” for a “jam”, he should check that his backing singers are all reading from the same songsheet.

Will the great and good sing about a brave new world, a popular consensus, education, the NHS or the red flag?

Or will Ken Bigley make the words stick in their craws?’

Posted: 30th, September 2004 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink