Anorak News | Grave Concerns

Grave Concerns

by | 25th, October 2004

‘WHAT happens when you die?

”Either pay up or get out”

No, we’re not overly concerned about Heaven, Hell or all the in-betweens, more the earthly practicalities. What happens to your body?

If you choose to be buried in Sussex, this question should trouble you, because the Telegraph says that what goes on after your death may not be to your liking.

You see, Rother District Council are hot on graves. So when they saw that some headstones were not planted at 90 degrees to the perpendicular, they acted fast…by knocking them down.

As a direct result of this action, there is now far less chance of one of the area’s headstones toppling over in the event of a hurricane or earthquake and so injuring a small child or, God forbid, a fox.

But the headstones were left in situ, on the ground. And that presented the council with a new problem, what is known in council chambers as a “trip risk”.

So the council is to dig up the surface of graves and then embed memorial crosses and headstones so they no longer represent a risk to careless ramblers or stalking foxes.

As the council explains in its extensive study into this problem: “Laying down unsafe memorials has left a number which have not been refixed by the owner, or where the owner cannot be found.”

But before we suggest that the missing owner may be dead, we ask you to read on.

“They now present a risk, but a lesser risk than unsafe memorials, to the public and staff from tripping and falling over.”

And even less of a risk than leaving bodies lying on the grass or in the middle of the road…’

Posted: 25th, October 2004 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink