Anorak News | Crazy For Martin

Crazy For Martin

by | 26th, October 2004

‘SOAPS love a loony – there’s nothing like a bug-eyed loon on a murderous mission to get the rating figures up (think Janine, Lisa, Cindy…).

”I’ve only got you now, Teddy”

The latest crazy lady to grace Albert Square and the front page of the tabloids is Sarah.

She seems to have finally realised that Martin isn’t going to leave his wife for her – so, rather than sit around listening to Dido and knocking back Chardonnay like most spurned women, Sarah’s decided to kill the entire Fowler family – but it’s hard to hold that against her though really, isn’t it?

She’s already hospitalised Pauline by pushing her off a ladder and now she’s had Martin arrested. She told police that Martin had beaten her up after their one-night stand and was indeed sporting a face full of (self-inflicted) bruises.

She’s now broken into the Fowler house with a knife to terrorise Sonia. Unfortunately, though, it’s odds-on that it’ll be Sarah who ends up dead or written out.

As one mad woman leaves though, another returns – Kat Moon is back! She back and she’s paralytically drunk. Well, she was born a Slater.

As she was unconscious, it’s difficult to know if she’s returned to try and make a go of her marriage or just to raid the cellars of The Queen Vic.

Another Slater sister turning to drink is Zoe. After being dumped by Dennis, she decided to hit the tequilas in Angie’s Den.

Dennis is struggling to choose between Zoe and his space-hopper sister, Sharon, so he’s gone away to “sort me ‘ed out” – so that’s the last we’ll see of him then, hopefully.

Just as we get rid of one useless Watts, another one returns. Vicky is back in Walford and working in the launderette for some bizarre reason.

Chrissie is still determined to end Vicky’s relationship with her tutor Tommy on the grounds that he’s a disgusting old pervert, leching after young women.

Well, from someone who’s been married to Dirty Den, we can only bow to her superior knowledge.’

Posted: 26th, October 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink