Battle Of The Bulge
‘WHILE the doomsayers at the Guardian talk about Suicide attack in Falluja countdown – just stopping short of comparing the Black Watchs impending attack on the Iraqi city to some kind of modern day Charge of the Light Brigade – the Telegraph wonders about the British soldiers wellbeing.
The American ration packs were the envy of the British Army |
Looking at the pale and spotty complexions of a typical new recruit to the British Army, the paper thinks that any future invasions will be less a charge than a breathless shambling stroll with breaks for junk food, video games and fags.
So, new recruits to the Armed Forces will be given a booklet called Recruits Guide to Nutrition, in which the Ministry of Defence will instruct them how to eat.
The chefs who work the canteen will move the chips to the furthest end of the food counter, offering them only once the fighting men and women have negotiated a hazardous and arduous assault course of vegetables and fruit.
Brigadier Jeff Little of the Defence Catering Corps puts things in simple terms.
Food is a weapon of war, he tells the paper in a thinly veiled reference to the great sausage fight that was WWII and more recently the pizza fight that was The Battle of Old Trafford.
We are not taking away their comfort foods. Chips and burgers will still be available, but we hope to inform their choices.
So until Baghdad gets its first McDonalds and the chippy opens in Basra, its dates, heart of palm and fish for our brave boys.
None of which will be deep or even shallow-fried even if the Armys current campaign is boiling in oil…’
Posted: 8th, November 2004 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink