Anorak News | French Fry

French Fry

by | 12th, November 2004

‘FRANCE is under attack from a heavily-armed fighting force of native Americans.

Troy was surprised to note that the French coast tasted of hard cheese

Those who have observed the worsening relations between the two nations can say “Told you so” all they like, but the news that France is being eaten by a voracious breed of American crayfish (Procambarus clarkii) is not all good.

For starters, it’s not good for France, which although a big country has abandoned its imperialistic agenda and will not be acquiring any colonies in the foreseeable future.

It’s also, as the Times explains, bad news for frogs, which are being eaten in a way only visiting Americans can eat. Frogs and their tadpole young are being devoured in their thousands.

And it’s bad news for British holidaymakers who may find that the delightful hotel region they were planning visit in their driving tour of the Gironde region has fallen into the ocean.

Further east in the Landes region, a Patrick Dulau, director of nature conservation, compares the sea life to an invading army.

“I have seen them crossing roads in little groups to get to wetlands,” says he.

And there is nothing that can be done. Birds cannot eat them fast enough. Cages and traps used to destroy them have not worked well enough.

All that’s left for the French to is to make friends with this invading army, to embrace them as they would their own and hope that maybe, just maybe, someone will come to help them…’

Posted: 12th, November 2004 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink