Anorak News | Bum Rap

Bum Rap

by | 22nd, November 2004

‘SCIENTISTS may disagree over global warming and the shrinking of the polar ice caps, but when it comes to Beyonce’s bottom they speak with one voice.

No job is too big for Beyonce’s medical advisor

It really is disappearing – and fast.

The National Enquirer, the American equivalent of The Lancet, lines up not one but three experts to confirm the alarming fact.

It says the Destiny’s Child singer has lost about 12 pounds in recent weeks – “and most of it has come off at the expense of her best asset”.

No, not her voice, stupid. Her bum, which only three months ago was declared the most beautiful derriere in the world (i.e. America).

Dr Stacy Title, a weight loss guru from New York, says recent pictures appear to show that the singer has been exercising as well as dieting.

And that, warns renowned Chicago cosmetic surgeon Dr Gregory Turowski, is a dangerous cocktail.

“As commendable as exercising is, Beyonce should know that the very shape of her buttocks – that almost perfect sphere – will sadly be the first thing to disappear if she overdoes it.

“With a slimmer, more muscular rear from exercise and diet, she is unlikely to keep the perfect shape that made her so talked about, and therefore less likely to make beauty experts or fans vote her the best butt in showbiz again.”

If that is not motivation enough to get Beyonce off her perfect butt and, well, back down on her perfect butt, then she should listen to Florence Anthony, editor-in-chief of Black Elegance magazine.

“We like her better with a little meat on her bones,” she says, advising the singer to get a new doctor.

“The guys think this one may have worked you out a little too much – they love a baby who’s got back.”’

Posted: 22nd, November 2004 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink