Anorak News | The Dead Pool

The Dead Pool

by | 10th, December 2004

‘“I STARTED queuing yesterday and I expect petrol tomorrow.”

”Hull? Sorry, mate. This is the road to Hell”

So says the headline in this morning’s Independent above a shot of lines of cars stuck fast in a traffic jam.

This is Iraq – but, given the ordeal of commuting on Britain’s congested roads, it could be a picture of the M1 at rush hour.

The poor sod who’s given the paper his thoughts may just as easily be a British rep who’s missed his turning to the service station as an Iraqi who’s taken a three-day holiday from his job to get a splash of his country’s most abundant resource.

But things are to change, at least for Clive and his Megane, so long as he can make a friend to keep him company.

The Telegraph’s front page announces Transport Secretary Alistair Darling’s move to open a car-sharing lane on the M1 in 2008.

That may come just too late for dear Clive, who should by that time have just pulled into the petrol station forecourt and immediately passed out from the combined effects of leatherette poisoning and stress.

But at least his replacement in the job will be able to sail through the eight-mile stretch of tarmac between the Luton and St Alban’s exits with minimal fuss.

The Times adds more detail to the plan and says that between the hours of 7am and 10am and 4pm and 7pm the M1’s so-called “fast lane” will become a channel dedicated to cars carrying more than one passenger.

The idea is clearly to get some of the commuters out of their one-man, four-door saloon cars and so reduce the number of vehicles on the road.

But the effect could be to leave the traffic unchanged as rail commuters, sick of paying through the nose to be treated like sardines, see a gap in the line of traffic and go for it.

However, Clive’s descendants will be that bit happier at finally having someone to talk to, to row with and possibly to eat as they sit and dictate their last will and testament…’

Posted: 10th, December 2004 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink