Anorak News | A $1m Gerbil

A $1m Gerbil

by | 10th, January 2005

‘WHILE the stars of yesterday undergo surgery to look like they did back when they were famous and the stars of today backcomb their eyebrows, we wonder who we will worship at fame’s altar in time to come.

”Okay, act like you really like me”

Olivia Newton-John’s daughter Chloe seems a nice enough kind of girl. She’s signed a recording contract and plans to become America’s next pop princess.

But who will be her prince? Why, it’s none other than Kevin Federline, Mr Britney Spears and the next hot new thing on the stage.

So desperate is Britney to make her husband’s dream of stardom a reality, the Enquirer says she’s willing to splash out $1m on singing, acting and dancing classes for him.

Then, when he’s been given the works, Kev and Brit will tour the globe performing as a husband and wife double act, a kind of Richard & Judy in boob tubes and thongs.

”Britney knows it’s a desperate gamble,” says an unnamed pal of the singer, ”but she’ll do most anything to make him a success.”

The pal goes on: ”He cast a spell over Britney that not even Justin Timberlake could rival. In fact, this guy’s driven out all memories of Justin.”

And that would indeed be the same Justin that ”love psychic” Jill Dahne says will get back with Britney two years after the birth of her and Kevin’s first child – which is gonna be a girl.

”They’re soulmates,” says the ”psychic-to-the-stars”.

And what’s more, being already able to sing and dance, Justin looks like something of a cheap date…’

Posted: 10th, January 2005 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink