Anorak News | King Ennui

King Ennui

by | 11th, February 2005

‘MOST recent opinion polls that asked the public whether Prince Charles should marry his long-time mistress Camilla Parker-Bowles arrived at the same conclusion – we couldn’t care less.

”It’s simply smashing news”

We’re not even indifferent. Tosses don’t come in sufficiently small fractions to describe how much of one most of us give for the news announced yesterday.

But that hasn’t stopped the papers clearing out their front pages to devote to the news that, as the Times puts it, after 30 years Charles is putting his affair in order.

The Times itself gives over its first 12 pages, the Telegraph produces a special commemorative issue and even the Guardian tugs its forelock over four of its first five pages.

We should be grateful, therefore, for the Independent which populates its front page with all the news that you may otherwise have missed in your excitement.

It includes North Korea’s claim to have nuclear weapons, the White House suppressing a report that says federal officials were repeatedly warned of terror attacks involving aircraft in the run-up to 9/11 and incidents of anti-Semitism in Britain reaching a record high.

All of which is no doubt fascinating, but how can it compare with the news in the Times that, as a rat and a pig respectively, Charles and Camilla could not have chosen a more auspicious day on which to get married than April 8th?

Or with the speculation in the Telegraph over whether Camilla will get married in a dress by Robinson Valentine, Paddy Campbell or George of Asda?

Or indeed with the views expressed in the Guardian by such luminaries as Jilly Cooper (”It’s absolutely lovely”) and, er, Jilly Cooper again (”They’re both really nice people”)?

Sadly, this means that there isn’t space to record Jilly’s views on the rest of the day’s events – an omission that Anorak has seen fit to remedy.

On the North Korean nuclear bomb, for instance, (”It’s absolutely lovely”), or on Jews (”They’re really nice people”)…’

Posted: 11th, February 2005 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink