Anorak News | Rossy’s Restaurant

Rossy’s Restaurant

by | 22nd, February 2005

‘FOR those of you who don’t care much for Jamie Oliver, consider this: imagine if Paul Ross could cook?

”Just add a big dollop of tongue”

Just as it’s useful to console yourself in times of utmost peril by thinking how there is always someone worse off than yourself, it’s important when watching Oliver to think of how bad things could be.

For Jamie’s Kitchen, read Rossy’s Restaurant. For The Naked Chef, knit your fingers over your face and dare yourself to peer though at The Naked Ross.

And now think on as Paul Ross steps into the school kitchens and tells us how he’s going to save children from having to eat burgers made from reconstituted pigs’ rectums by cooking some pukka tukka.

Cripes! Someone get John McCrirrick to offer odds on which will make the audience hurl first, Ross’s desperate hunger to be on the box or looking at the god-awful food we feed our children?

But before we scream “Come back, Jamie, all is forgiven!”, we note that he is still here.

It’s Oliver and not Ross, or some other lightweight TV makeweight in the kitchens seeing if he can do better than the dinner ladies.

He’d struggle to do worse, as the women who serve food with all the finesse of a UN food drop examine the chef’s efforts.

But still Oliver has his work cut out trying to improve the nation’s school meals, which have to be made for all of 37p per head.

In Jamie’s School Dinners he’ll have a good go at it. And, who knows, he may succeed and have a few bob left over at the end to spend on a new show for the aforesaid Ross.

Perhaps something involving Ross being overweight and trying to lose some pounds by not eating too much and nodding his head at each and every camera?

Or what about one where Ross learns to cook?’

Posted: 22nd, February 2005 | In: Celebrities Comment | TrackBack | Permalink