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Anorak News | Sally Fourth…Or Fifth

Sally Fourth…Or Fifth

by | 23rd, February 2005

‘SIMPLE Sally’s relationship with her boss isn’t the straightforward affair that she thought it was going to be.

”I said I was having trouble with my clutch”

Ian and his wife have taken their daughter on holiday for half-term week and while he was away, Sally received an unexpected visitor at the car showroom.

“I’m Della Hopkins,” the glamorous brunette told Sally. “I used to do your job – all of your job, if you get my drift. I believe you’re number 4…or is it 5?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” a flustered Sally tried to convince Della, “we have a strictly professional relationship.”

But Della knows our Ian a lot better than that. “Come off it, love! He trades in his women as often as he trades in his cars – except that he treats his cars a lot better.”

Sally rushed straight round to her agony aunt Gail – with the emphasis being on the viewers’ agony as Sally droned on and on for two episodes. “I’m going to tell Kevin everything,” Sally told Gail, mentally. “It’s the only way out of this mess.”

Once the double gin she’d downed had worn off, Sally came to her senses and realised that Kevin may not see her affair with Ian in the same light that she does, i.e. as part of her career development.

Sally may have her hand forced soon, however, as Tommy has put two and two together and for once come up with the right number. “I reckon she’s ‘avin’ an affair,” he growled to wife Angela over a pint in The Rovers.

So far Angela’s managed to convince Tommy not to say anything, but for a man with a fuse shorter than Mike Tyson’s, it’s unlikely he’s going to be able to stick to that promise.

And on the subject of psychotic men, Charlie is determined to “make Sunita pay” – and that’s not for one of Betty’s Hotpots. Charlie discovered that Sunita tampered with the scales during the great Shelly weigh-in.

“Don’t worry, love,” the charmer of the year told her the night before she was due to get weighed, “some women suit loads of extra flab.”

With 24 hours left to go, Shelly was still two pounds over the ‘target weight’ Charlie had set her. She spent the whole of Valentine’s Day in the gym but short of chopping off her head – she was never going to make it.

On second thoughts, even a total lobotomy wouldn’t have made much difference, given the fact she clearly has no brain in the first place.’



Posted: 23rd, February 2005 | In: Strange But True Comment | TrackBack | Permalink