Anorak News | House Invader

House Invader

by | 1st, March 2005

‘EVERY age creates the conditions by which its heroes will emerge.

Wallpapering over the cracks

And anyone watching proceedings in the House of Commons last night, as the Government struggled to get its Terror Act through Parliament, could not doubt that a hero is needed.

The tired green benches of the Commons chamber and the tired green faces of those who sat on them were crying out the same urgent message.

It’s time for a makeover. It’s time to introduce a bit of taste into British politics. In short, it’s time for Lawrence Llewelyn-Bowen.

And happily we read in this morning’s Independent that LLB has reached exactly the same conclusion.

The Changing Rooms star will apparently be in Greenwich today canvassing on behalf of the Purple Party, of which he is the founding and, one suspects, sole member.

The paper says the party (which is the subject of a BBC3 documentary) has released a draft manifesto with policies on everything from crime to the environment to heritage.

And the man himself bemoans the fact that the country is drowning in a sea of political correctness and dullness.

“Something needs to be done,” he says.

And we wholeheartedly agree – there’s nothing in British public life that a truckload of MDF, Linda Barker and a stencil set could not improve.

You don’t need to be a man of Lawrence Llewelyn-Bowen’s rare taste, however, to know that some combinations of colours sit easier than others.

Certainly, Robert Kilroy Silk is having problems putting orange and black together.

The Indy says attempts by the strangely hued former talkshow host to counter claims that his Veritas party is a racist organisation have “rather gloriously backfired”.

The party’s spokesman for sport, a black former boxer called Winston McKenzie, told The Voice that there should be a limit on children of ethnic minorities entering Britain because the prisons were too full already.

“We need to limit the number of them coming in,” he said. “In four or five years, our prisons will be overcrowded because these children will turn to crime.”

And nick all the sunbeds…’

Posted: 1st, March 2005 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink