Anorak News | Blue Remembered Mills

Blue Remembered Mills

by | 9th, March 2005

‘“STROP OF THE LEAGUE,” declares the Sun, above a picture of a bald-headed thug whose face is contorted in a mask of pure hatred.

Mills is dark and very possibly Satantic

But this is no mindless hooligan; it is Danny Mills, the former England player who now plies his trade at Manchester City – a club described by the paper as being “top of the table”.

The table in question is not the Premiership, however, but the Sun’s own swearing league.

As a protest against bad behaviour in football, the paper has enlisted the aid of TV replays and lip-reading experts in order to monitor the amount of swearing in top-level matches.

It then names and shames the guilty men and demands that the clubs pay £5 to gypsy charities – sorry, the Great Ormond Street children’s hospital – for every expletive.

The paper has yet to receive any payment from City, who are early leaders with nine swear-words, five ahead of second-placed Blackburn, who say they are “going to look at it”.

City’s star swearer is the aforementioned Danny Mills, and the paper devotes a special box to a list of his foul-mouthed utterances during City’s match against Bolton.

It’s a shocking read. “F*** off,” he tells the ref, while Bruno N’Gotty is called a “f***ing prick”.

Space restrictions have apparently prevented the paper from recording Mills’ parting shot: “F*** off, Sun”. A clear reference to fellow defender Sun Jihai, we hasten to add.’

Posted: 9th, March 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink