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The Better Book

by | 15th, March 2005

‘ANYONE reading the Bible will be forgiven for wondering in the name of all that is good, righteous and wears sandals over white socks is going on.

‘God’ is now known as ‘Trevor’

Trying to fathom out the message is hard enough, but it’s a study not overly aided by the language. All that begatting, begotting and begetting is hard on the head.

But now, as the Telegraph reports, the Bible has been updated.

No longer will youngsters have to work out if getting Stephen “stoned” was a punishment or something to be envied, as the New International Version arrives at a hotel bedside cabinet near you.

The word “aliens” has been replaced by ‘foreigners”. “Saints” are deemed to be too ecclesiastical and are now “God’s chosen people”. And Mary is no longer “with child”; she is “pregnant”.

And while Jews consider suing for breach of copyright, women at least get equal billing.

This new version no longer says: “When God created man, he made him in the likeness of God”; but: “When created human beings, he made them in the likeness of god.”

All well and good. But when you meet your maker, please try not to stare…’



Posted: 15th, March 2005 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink