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House Calls

by | 18th, March 2005

‘WHAT a bunch of dolts they are at the House of Commons to fool for a fake?

Posing as President Bush, Boffey soon convinced Tony to bomb Leicester

You’d never catch the Mirror getting caught out by an untruth, and certainly not the “FAKED” references that enabled Mirror reporter Daniel Boffey to get a job at the Commons.

In the front-page sensation “OPEN HOUSE”, Boffey tells the world how he scored a job working as a switchboard operator at the seat of power.

This, unsurprisingly, gave him access to phone numbers, including Tony Blair’s direct office number.

While Boffey resists the urge to publish the number of the hotline to the top, he tells us that the grey pass he was given presented some other temptations.

There was the time he resisted the urge to whisper, “Don’t say a word, it’s me Kimberley” to David Blunkett as the pair rode an escalator.

He fought the pull to compliment ex-Trade Secretary Stephen Byers on his choice of socks, or ask him if he wore them in his or anyone else’s bed.

And when he came face to face with Home Secretary Charles Clarke, that man who is so tough on security it hurts, Boffey thought better of saying: “The great Osama’s beard is better than yours.”

Instead, he just answered phones and looked around with his camera-video phone, which he took no less than four times to the area behind the Speaker’s Chair.

Back there, he heard Cabinet Ministers talk and mingled with ease.

And never once did he fall victim to the greatest temptation of them all – to fall into a deep, deep sleep…

Paul Sorene is the Anorak’



Posted: 18th, March 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink