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Vanity Unfair

by | 5th, April 2005

‘DESPERATE Housewives is a show that has now garnered more articles than it has viewers.

A godsend to desperate hacks

No day passes without some tired hack putting pen to paper and telling us about the “Real Desperate Housewives”, or how each of the stars is just like their own character, one of the other characters or some character you’d not walk down a dark alley with if your life depended on it.

And today the Express has more news of the show, telling jaded readers that “This [see picture of the five lead women] could be the last time the five stars of Desperate Housewives are photographed together.”

But before you call the emergency suicide line, read on through the tears. And thereby learn the reason for this sensational development.

It seems that trouble flared on the set of a shoot for the cover of Vanity Fair magazine.

The story goes that Marcia Cross “exploded” with fury when co-star Teri Hatcher chose the red swimsuit. It seems Hatcher had first dibs, and Marcia was not best pleased.

“Get your ******** ass over here now and do your ******* job,” she screamed at an assistant.

Things then got worse when the photographer asked the aptly-named Cross to swap places with Nicolette Sheridan – who refused.

Cindy Adams, “a columnist”, tells us that there were lots of “tears and tantrums”. And one senior executive on the show labelled the gang “the bitches from hell”.

It all sounds so awful. But if Cross wants to exact revenge then she could do worse than turn to the Mirror and cut out and keep the paper’s shot of the unmovable Sheridan straining to stay within a pair of white bikini briefs.

Cellulite and some surplus flesh are clearly on view – as Nicolette will soon see for herself as the unflattering picture is posted on her dressing room door…

Paul Sorene is the Anorak’



Posted: 5th, April 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink