Anorak News | Reality Love

Reality Love

by | 18th, May 2005

‘EVERY cloud has a silver lining, and the Kylie story has allowed the papers to quietly sideline their Love Island coverage.

Tonight Peter and Jordan will be watching each other

This will come as a relief, as the much-hyped ITV show is proving nearly as big a flop as the station’s recent Celebrity Wrestling disaster, which was ignominiously dropped after a couple of weeks.

“TURNED OFF,” declares the Mirror. “ONE MILLION viewers desert Love Island on its first night.”

All the tabloid columnists give the programme a well-deserved kicking, but the Sun gives the biggest kicking of the lot, courtesy of gusset – sorry, guest – pundit Jordan.

“Since becoming pregnant I like nothing better than settling down in front of the telly,” she reveals, as she gets comfy in her favourite armchair, with a packet of Hob-Nobs on the armrest and little Peter Andre balanced on her bump.

“Celebrity Love Island is complete dross,” she opines, describing it as “a boring show full of fame-hungry, no-mark celebrities.”

Hear, hear. But there’s more.

“None of the so-called celebs on the show are remotely interested in finding love – they are just trying to boost their profiles.”

And before you start getting clever, and pointing out that she and Peter were once drawn together by a shared desire to boost their profiles via reality TV, consider this: “When Pete and I went into the jungle, the attraction was there and we fell for each other… You can’t manufacture chemistry.”

Of course, viewers have the option of turning off, and many have already done so. But chez Jordan, there is a problem. Turn off the box and you’ve still got two fame-hungry no-marks trying to work out how to boost their profile.

In fact, that could be the way forward: a celebrity Royle Family, in which former reality stars grumble their way through Love Island from the comfort of their celebrity living-rooms.

Time to get the webcam up and running, Katie P.’

Posted: 18th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink