Anorak News | War On Wannabes

War On Wannabes

by | 31st, May 2005

‘BOB Geldof has told us what he wants what he really, really, wants.

Feed the Spices

He wants to put an end to world hunger. He wants us to dig deep into our pockets and give until it hurts. He wants to zigazig ah.

And, as the Mirror says on its front page, what the patron saint of pop doesn’t want is the Spice Girls rocking up at his Live Aid II, curiously named Live 8, and ruining things with their brand of what the Mirror terms “plastic pop”.

Only last week, Ginger, Scary, Baby, Posh and the other one were celebrating being booked to sing at the show. This would give them a return to front-line pop, a move that would surely see them reclaim their pre-eminent position in the global music scene.

Now, just a few days on, a spokesman for the Girls says they will be “gutted” at being denied the chance to do their bit to ease world hunger.

But can this be right? A spokesman for the BBC, which is to broadcast the show on July 2, explains snootily that “with all due respect to them, Live 8 isn’t Party in the Park”.

So what is it? “It’s a political rally to out pressure on world leaders and their kind of pop act didn’t seem right for this kind of event.”

Oh come on. Would a selfish non-politicised band consider singing, “If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give”? And as for Girl Power and the championing of a woman’s right to vote and flash her knickers, well…

And we wonder how if the selfless Spices are not allowed in, why the likes of Robbie Williams singing a version of We Will Rock You and Oasis doing for the Who’s My Generation what they have previously done for the Beatles are.

While we have a rethink – and slowly come to realise that Destiny’s Child, who will be playing, are something other than a manufactured trio, and how being bootylicious is not a chance to brag about your big arse, but a biting satire on world hunger – we wonder if Geldof has got it wrong.

Rather than stop Geri and her girl gang performing, perhaps it would be better to let them play on. And better still if they could line up as they left us, as a fourpiece. This way the Crazy Frog could stand in for La Halliwell.

The message will be that the band will only stop singing when the world changes into something Geldof approves of.

To our mind, there’ll be a revolution by the second bar of Say You’ll Be there…’

Posted: 31st, May 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink