Anorak News | Box Their Ears

Box Their Ears

by | 9th, June 2005

‘THERE’S too much f***ing swearing television.

Danan finds Hervey is as lightweight as he is

Just last night, Paul Danan told his fellow Celebrity Love Island hopeful Isabella Hervey she was a “f***ing bitch”.

That’s no way to treat a Lady, even if she is wearing a bikini and appearing on a TV show designed to give British TV its first live shag.

Of course, in Danan’s defence, he did at least utter his expletive on a show that no-one watches, and if it wasn’t for the Mirror reporting the word, few if any of us would have heard it.

Or heard Lady Isabella tell her fellow strumpets: “I was very scared. I thought he was going to hit me at one stage.”

And violence on TV will not do, even if it is after the watershed. If Danan and Hervey want to fight in public they can go to some pedestrianised town centre at pub closing time like everyone else.

But no sooner has the Mirror spotted one flare up than it scoots over to the Big Brother encampment to hear wannabe fishwife Lesley scream at “silly little tart” Sam: “One day you’re going to have the s*** knocked out of you.”

If Lesley would be good enough to tell Channel 4, which broadcasts the show, when this beating will occur, producers can at least advertise it and produce some teasing trails.

They could call it Celebrity Happy Slapping, and sell it as the first show made with a mobile phone audience in mind.

But Lesley failed to elaborate on her confident prediction. And while Channel 4 bosses sense a missed opportunity, we offer the show our hearty congratulations for combining TV’s twin passions of swearing and violence.

Who needs a show with scripts, plots and actors when you’ve got talent that can improvise like that?’

Posted: 9th, June 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink