Anorak News | Bodyline


by | 9th, June 2005

‘“WE’VE got a great chance to win the Ashes this year. Let’s hope our boys can kick Shane and his team-mates where it hurts.”

It’s a toss up

The considered words there of Becky, 24, from London, whose chief interests are cricket and wearing knickers. That today she manages to combine her two passions on the Sun’s Page 3 is a credit to her drive. She dared to dream.

But what about her words? We in no way condone violence, especially kicking Australian cricketers. And, in any case, it’s hard to knock them where it hurts if you can’t see the targets.

Now, calm yourselves, dear Australians. This is no assault on your nation’s collective manhood, just an observation based on a new portrait of Australian cricketing hero Shane Warne.

The original portrait by artist Fanny Rush (no giggling at the back), as shown in the Sun, features Warne in his cricket whites looking clearly aroused for action.

But it would not do. The painting, which will hang at Lord’s…in the Long Room (cut it out), was not suitable. “The MCC wanted him to look, shall we say, less masculine,” says Rush. “It was a toss-up who I was going to offend – Shane or the MCC!”

Ok! That’s it. Get it out your system. Laugh. Giggle. You people have no respect for our national summer sport. You disgust us.

So, it’s over to the Mirror, where Shane is heard appraising his now touched up and downsized likeness in oil. “It’s an honour,” says he “And I hope the members like it.”

Well said…’

Posted: 9th, June 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink