Faking The Michael
‘IT is a rare event, but we can exclusively reveal that not every footballer likes to feather his already over-padded Mock Tudor nest with money earned from the sale of the rights to his wedding photos.
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| As if by magic, Louise disappeared from view |
This is clearly a case of the world gone mad. And youd be well within your rights to dash outside and check which way is up.
But doubtless gripped by our revelation, you have not dared move, and its up to us to say the sun IS in the sky, God IS in Madrid and Michael Owen IS marrying his childhood sweetheart, Louise Bonsall.
What dyer mean youve never heard of her? Shes only the girlfriend of footballs golden goalscorer, the spearhead of Englands World Cup bids past and future.
Granted, she is hard to spot in the players wives pen. What with Victoria Beckhams oversized baseball hats and massive sunglasses, its hard to spot anything else. But we can assure you that shes there alright.
And now shes marrying her man. And no, youre not invited.
Michael and his beloved have kept quiet about their marriage, (ie theyve not contacted OK!) and have gone as far as to book two different venues in a bid to stave off prying eyes.
But they cant avoid speculating non-guests called OK!. And its up to the magazine that can to imagine what the wedding will be like.
It might feature the likes of Victoria and David Beckham. If it does, keeping it a secret may be harder than dear Miss Bonsall could ever imagine, as Vicky straddles a unicorn and rides around the place pouting.
The do might also have cost around £500,000. And its believed the guests will enjoy a tasty spread, quaff the finest champagne and dance the night away.
Sounds just great. And it can only be topped by actually being there…’
Posted: 23rd, June 2005 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
