Anorak News | Salad Dressing

Salad Dressing

by | 6th, July 2005

‘AFTER Jacques Chirac’s comments on British food yesterday, the Sun seeks to slowly pull the legs off the man it calls the original Crazy Frog.

‘Don’t worry, love, it’s just the alcohol talking’

It’s secured the mouth and palette of bricklayer Gary Scales to sample grub at two unnamed London restaurants and see which he prefers – French or British.

Wiping away a spot of foie gras from his overalls, Scales rocks back in his chair, pats his rotund tum-tum and says: “I would plump for British grub every time.”

Of course he would. As would anyone in their right mind – a mind not addled by eating amphibians, snails and snot-like droppings of rare cheese.

And Spanish food isn’t much better. As the Mail writes, Spanish farmers have been using household sewage water to water the lettuce crops they export to Britain.

“When they don’t get irrigation water they turn to other water,” says Spain’s environment minister, Christina Narbona of her country’s farmers.

As a farmer from south-east Spain puts it: “The water we receive is not enough, so we are forced to mix it with the sewage from our homes.”

And this is not to everyone’s taste. As the paper says, an outbreak of salmonella which affected 96 people in the UK last year has been traced to Spain.

The message is to play it safe. Anyone travelling to Spain should avoid eating lettuce unless it is cleansed in copious amounts of free-flowing bug-busting alcohol.

Or failing that, avoid it all together and stick to the egg and chips…

Paul Sorene’

Posted: 6th, July 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink