Anorak News | Abiding Law

Abiding Law

by | 19th, July 2005

‘UNTIL this week the only bad things about Jude Law was his American accent.

Miller’s tale is between his legs

Universally looked upon as being nice looking, a nice young man who’s nice to his family, nice Law was fancied by nice women who liked their men doe-eyed, soft and nice.

Now he’s “randy Jude”. His films flop but he doesn’t. He cheated on his blonde fiancée, Sienna Miller, and, as the Sun reports, “begged” nanny Daisy Wright to take part in a threesome.

She declined. And a close pal of the shocked nanny explains why. “She is a respectable young girl and told him No… Daisy did fancy Jude but she didn’t want to share him intimately with another woman. She just isn’t that kind of girl.”

She’s a veritable English rose is Daisy, who told all in a Sunday red-top. As is Miller, who, like the nanny, didn’t want to share Jude intimately with another woman either, including one hired to look after his children.

So she’s called off their wedding and, as the Sun says, is “too angry to cry”.

As a budding actress, we advise Sienna to give crying a go, and to broaden her range with a little yelling, shouting, screaming and hollering. Who knows, with enough practice she may yet use this tragedy to her advantage and get a part on EastEnders.

As it is, a source puts things in perspective and says that Jude feels like the “most hated man in Britain”. Indeed, he must be. We can imagine nothing worse than a Hollywood star cheating on his girlfriend. He should be deported.

But is he all to blame? Or should we look long and hard at the nanny? As the Mirror explains, Ms Wright is the just the latest home help to misinterpret her terms of employment.

It remembers 27-year-old Abbie Gibson, former nanny to the Beckhams’ three sons, who revealed “intimate secrets” of her employees’ lives. She’s now seeking up to £60,000 at an employment tribunal.

Tennis star John McEnroe cheated on his former wife, Tatum O’Neal, with not one but two nannies. He’s the pits. And nanny Sandra Rivett, 29, caused all sorts of trouble for her boss, Lord Lucan, when she got herself murdered.

But celebrity mothers need not panic. They can still lunch and see the accessories when they are clean and undemanding if they follow the Sun’s guide to hiring help.

In a cut-out-and keep tip sheet, the Sun says that the nanny should be shaped “like an old sofa – comfy, caring and a bit worn around the edges.” (Although should she have children by Wayne Rooney, Coleen McGlouglin should skip this part.)

Do not employ a nanny who looks good in “low cut, see-through tops and cute pink boots”. And while you can trust the help with the kids, think twice before allowing her to accompany your man on a trip to the US, as Sienna did.

Oh, and if he does still cheat on you with your helpful cuddly, frumpy older woman, seek comfort in the fact that at least he’ll fancy you when you’re older…’

Posted: 19th, July 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink