Anorak News | Breaking Up

Breaking Up

by | 8th, September 2005

‘CLUNK! Did you hear that? That was the sounds made by our jaw dropping to the ground. Now prepare yourselves for some emergency dental treatment as you read: “JEN DUMPS VINCE!”

Vince in the Dead Sea of Jen’s tears

And – get this! – Jennifer Aniston has only gone and called time on her love affair with Vince Vaughn just as filming on their new movie ends. And the title of that movie? The Break Up! Wow, indeed.

But how did it happen. Obviously it was written in the stars, but what reason is she giving for giving the tall actor the heave-ho.

“While Jennifer adores Vince,” says an insider, “she discovered she’s not in love with him and never has been.” But they looked so great together. How did it fail?

“He dried her eyes and got rid of the tears that flowed after Brad left,” continues the “friend”.

And having used the actor like a 6-foot-5 tissue, poor Vince has to hear the source say that Jen still loves Brad. “Vince can never replace him.”

The lovable big guy might be big, but he can’t fill the void Brad has left in her heart.

But while Vince puts himself through the wringer, and squeezes out Jen’s tears, we hear that life for Brad is not so picture perfect.

The 56th rule of celebrity reporting stipulates that any story on Jen must be accompanied by a story on Brad, and vice versa. So beneath Jen’s tale of non romance, we hear: “Brad & Angelina: THEY’RE FIGHTING!”

Brad’s attempt to bring together Angelina Jolie and her dad, John Voigt, failed. “Fighting back tears… a fuming Angelina reportedly listened as Brad struggled to justify his decision,” says the Enquirer.

Unforgivable the Enquirer tells us nothing of what then occurred. All we get is a potted history of the Voigt-Jolie feud. There’s no more news of the “NASTY FIGHT”.

But if things do not go well between the pair, and either Brad or Angelina fancy a good chat, need a friend and perhaps even a cry, either or both of them can call Vince.

Who can then call the dry cleaners…’

Posted: 8th, September 2005 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink