Anorak News | Opera Buff

Opera Buff

by | 27th, January 2006

‘THE closest most is get to opera is ordering in a pizza from Don Giovanni’s and listening to ads on the telly for beer and mouthwash.

But opera offers so much more than just heartburn. As the Mail reports, opera offers us the chance to marvel at the powerful lungs on the finest divas.

The paper produces shots of pneumatic divas Katherine Jenkins, Myleen Klass and Charlotte Church to illustrate how talented and versatile a girl has to be to reach the top notes.

Mail readers will doubtless be delighted to learn something new, to have their field of vision broadened by so much exposed talent. But not everyone is happy.

Blonde Russian soprano Marian Laslo refuses to take the plunge and show off her cleavage. When a recording industry executive suggested that showing more cleavage would do her career no harm she took exception.

“I was raised to conduct myself like a lady and have no interest in compromising those standards to achieve a short cut to fame,” says she haughtily.

She goes on: “The market is full of blonde classical artists with their cleavages on show.”

To prove this point, the Sun produces a helpful double-page spread entitled: “TOSCAS OUT FOR THE LADS.”

This potted guide to the opera world features the aforesaid “big-chested Welsh warbler” Katherine Jenkins, who is given a “PAVA-TOTTI” RATING of an impressive five musical notes.

We also learn that blonde “sexy” Shawna Stone makes “opera buffs quaver”, Charlotte Church looks like she’s got a couple of “big hits” and “opera babes” Karen England and Rebecca Knight have “twin peaks that hit all the right notes”.

But while the Sun’s readers learn to appreciate the sopranos’ middle C to high Cs, they are taught that opera is not all about the busty blonde babes – opera can just as easily be about fuller-figured brunettes.

So there are pictures of Lesley Garrett and Angelina Kalahari. And there’s a shot some woman called Pavarotti, who looks like she possesses a voice that can shatter crystal, opera glasses and patio doors.

And a cleavage that seduces fame…’

Posted: 27th, January 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink