Anorak News | Brazilian Nut

Brazilian Nut

by | 24th, February 2006

‘NOTHING in life is more momentous than the birth of a celebrity’s baby. And for Kate Garraway, the GMTV presenter, things are just so.

Kate birthing gown was the talk of the maternity ward

Like you, we’ve been watching Kate grow. And by now we estimate that the baby will arrive any day now.

Little wonder, then, that Kate is excited and concerned. There are so very many things to do.

First, the important things. Kate has got herself ready for the birth by having a Brazilian wax, a St Tropez spray tan, a pedicure and her eyelashes dyed.

Well-travelled Kate wants to look her best for her bundle of joy. And we hope that the tan has dried when the baby is placed upon Kate’s breast lest it rub off and cause the little love to turn an orangey brown colour, like some miniaturised Kilroy.

After her spot of redecorating, Kate has found time for an “alternative rampage”. As Kate explains, this involves “unlocking your conscious knowledge of giving birth so that when the pain starts, rather than thinking, oh my God – like if you break your arm – you just go with it.”

Sounds good. Not as good as drugs. But, nonetheless, pretty good.

But before little Ulna can be born, Kate is enjoying carrying a child. Says she: “There’s something reassuring about having a little thing squiggling inside me.”

But if husband Derek is not around – he’s busy pouring four pints of semi-skimmed milk into Kate’s bath – she can always hurry things along with a curry…’

Posted: 24th, February 2006 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink