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Phone Home

by | 28th, April 2006

‘HERE is news that Brad Pitt might like to consider as he makes his way by huge metal bird from Namibia to Los Angeles: the telephone has been invented.

‘You bring the sushi?’

The Star says that Pitt has left his pregnant lover Angelina Jolie and her two adopted children in Africa while he dashes home to speak with the family doctor.

The story goes that the couple’s adopted daughter Zahara suffers from rickets, a condition she developed in an Ethiopian orphanage.

Worried that the one-year-old could fall ill, Brad has hopped aboard a private flight to consult with Zahara’s “main doctor”.

A source explains further. “When he mentioned Zahara had a cold he was shocked to be told that in Namibia she was more susceptible to diseases like malaria and yellow fever as her immune system would have been weakened by rickets.”

Who could have imagined that sub-Saharan Africa held such dangers? Not Brad, it seems. Whatever next? Huge reptiles with long snapping jaws and smiling eyes? Massive cats with manes? Flies?

Such horrors and more must surely be swirling around Brad’s head as he seeks urgent medical advice. And if the doctor says the Jolie-Pitts must return home, then Angelina, son Maddox and Zahara will head for the States.

But how will Brad be able to deliver his family the medical verdict? We fear the actor will need to make yet another intrepid trip into the heart of darkness…’



Posted: 28th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink