Anorak News | Dream On

Dream On

by | 2nd, May 2006

‘ANOTHER devastating blow for John Prescott this morning comes in the shape of a poll which reveals that Simon Cowell is the man most women would like to sleep with.

‘Did I tell you about the time I got hit by an egg?’

The man who gave the world Westlife is the choice of 21% of women in the survey published in the Star, just ahead of Robbie Williams (20%) and Daniel Craig (19%).

And he is naturally delighted. “The people who voted for me clearly have excellent taste,” he says.

But before Simon’s ego reaches heights not dreamt of even by the waistline of his trousers and Prezza demands a recount, let’s look closely at the company he’s keeping and ask just who the people who voted for him are.

Do we seriously believe that, given a choice of any woman in the world, 11.4% of the male population would opt for some horseplay with Zara Phillips?

Or that 6% would plump for “cuddly” Fern Britton, while Vanessa Feltz rates ne’er a mention?

And what of the mysterious absence of the DPM?

That would be strange in any circumstances, but doubly so given that the sponsor of the poll is none other than the UK’s biggest bed manufacturer Silentnight.

After all, isn’t their logo something to do with a little bird lying with a hippopotamus?’

Posted: 2nd, May 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink