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HAVING drawn our attention to Michael Douglas’s haggard neck and Madonna’s sinewy hands, the Mail looks at Keith Richards’ finger.

The Mail’s ‘They’re Just Like You & Me – Probably Worse’ campaign spots Richards posing for the snappers with the rest of the Rolling Stones.

The paper says that on the surface things look pretty good for Keith, but time has taken its toll on his finger. The “final joint on his right index finger looks badly swollen and arthritic – making it look a little like the elongated digits of the alien ET.”

There then follows a picture of ET, although it might be another shot of Richards.

And while the Mail looks at Keith’s bony, odd-looking finger – which seems entirely in keeping with the rest of the man – the musician is talking to the press.

Before the Mail’s man with a notepad can ask Keith about arthritis and aching joints, Keith tells us about the accident that caused him to undergo brain surgery.

Readers will recall how Keith fell out of a coconut tree in Fiji. And they now hear that it was no such thing. “If you saw the tree, you would realise the joke,” says Keith. “It certainly was not a coconut tree…It was just a little tree.”

The Mirror hears Keith say the same thing in his, er, “exclusive” interview with the Mirror, and go on to talk about the operation to repair his head.

“They put me out like a light,” says Keith, who may well have tested the anaesthetist’s powers to the full. “Usually I would be hanging from the ceiling at the idea of brain surgery,” says Keith. “But I surprised myself and I had complete confidence in them.”

The medics have done a good job, even if Keith was “p***ed off” when they woke him up. “I was enjoying myself!” says Keith.

And we are enjoying having him back. It’s just a shame that when he was under the knife, they didn’t fix his finger…

Posted: 11th, July 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink