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Anorak News | Mini Bea

Mini Bea

by | 8th, August 2006

AS soon as we saw the picture of Princess Beatrice braying like an eroticised donkey and sucking on a wealthy Texan’s toe our only question was why it had taken so long.

Of course this is not true, we made it up. Princess Bea might have a shortened name like her mum Sarah ‘Fergie’ Ferguson, but that is where the similarities begin and end.

Although Bea wants more. As the Mirror’s headline says, Bea wants to be the “MINI MUMMY”.

“Looking strikingly like mum Sarah”, Bea joins her mater on a tour of young cancer patients at University College Hospital (Sarah is patron of the Teenage Cancer Trust).

Both dressed in tailored jackets over white tops, Sarah and mini-me Bea are photographed doing the rounds. This is Bea’s first official engagement.

It is Bea’s 18th birthday today and she delivers her thoughts and dreams for the future in what the Sun calls a “cringe-worthy interview”.

“I see myself as a mini-mummy,” the Mail hears her say. She turns to her mother. “I kind of have this image that anything you can do, I want to do better.”

It’s a noble ambition. And we look out for Bea trumping her mother’s many notable achievements – getting her hair redder, her children’s helicopter to soar higher and her boyfriend’s toes to be longer and fuller.

Bea goes on: “She is the best advice-giver I could possibly ever wish for. She leads by example and her behaviour is one that I’d really like to follow.”

We wish Bea well. But there aren’t all that many princes around these days and she may be forced to kiss a few frogs’ feet before she can emulate her mummy…



Posted: 8th, August 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink