Anorak News | Do I Like Orange

Do I Like Orange

by | 14th, August 2006

WITH any disappointment at being overlooked for the England captain’s job behind him, Steven Gerrard has moved on.

“GERRARD MY STORY,” says the headline on the News Of The World’s cover. “How I got perfect Alex to be my lover. My shock over her arrest.” And: “PLUS: More amazing revelations in 55 pages of sport!”

Fifty-five pages of revelations is a lot of revealing. And before football can be laid bare, we turn to the football book that the NOTW says “THEY ALL WANTED”.

You might still be reading Frank Lampard’s autobiography, which also appeared this summer and was serialised in the Sun.

In which case you are left with a choice not unlike the one that faced Sven Goran Eriksson – should you close the book on Lampard and move to Gerrard, or can both be used together? Can you read a bit of Lampard and a bit of Gerrard and form them into a potent mixture? Or will the result just be a confusing mess?

But as we ponder that, there is new and exciting news. No sooner has the book been printed than Steven’s Wag-tastic fiancée Alex Curran (has she not a fragrance; has she not day-glo orange chic) been pinched.

It has been alleged that Alex was involved in a fight at Liverpool’s Shangri-La restaurant. Alex has been released on police bail.

This must be one of those sporting revelations promised on the NOTW’s front page. It’s an unpleasant story of alleged violence on a night out; far removed from sporting revelations about how some player always put his shorts on last and that the grass at White Hart Lane is 25 per cent clover.

But lest you think Gerrard’s tome is a celebrity book, the NOTW produces further extracts from it towards the back of the paper. And turning to it we read: “I swallowed paracetamol like SMARTIES”.

Or half-time oranges…

Posted: 14th, August 2006 | In: Back pages Comment | TrackBack | Permalink