Big Brother – What Next?

YOU still there? Big Brother has been on for an age. Who on hearing the words “Day 94” doesn’t think about their life and what happened to the summer?

We are all older. And we are all a little wiser. We now know what Tourette’s is, and that it is unlikely we will hear the word ”w*******” said so often on the telly until at least tomorrow when the Premier League football season begins in earnest.

We have learned that gay men are not all good at put downs and dressing (Richard and Daryl Van Horne), that Esther Rantzen has not stamped out playground bullying (Grace) and that false breasts come in a variety of shapes andf sizes, from toffee apple (Nikki) to apple tree (Lea).

And we know about the finalists. In strict alphabetical order – and to make sure Aisleyne comes first – we take a look at their best bit and what the future holds in store for them.

Aisleyne
Best bit: Telling Nikki to “Know yourself little girl.”
Future: Having better hair extensions put in; taking the place of Chantelle Houghton as our favourite assisted blonde; dedicating her win to the people of Jamaica

Glyn
Best bit: Enjoying a lapdance from Lea. What are the chances?
Future: Walk on part on the Welsh language soap opera Pobol y Cwm (People of the Valley); vomiting over Leicester Square

Gyny
Best moment: Umm…?
Future: Wearing football tops in the community

Richard
Best moment: His audition tape when he said he was the “sexual terrorist”
Future: Agony uncle on LetsChat.com

Nikkkkkkki
Best moment: Leaving the house the first time
Future: Trapping Pete into a prolonged love affair and being exposed as Vanessa Feltz’s older sister

Pete
Best moment: Winning; calling eveyone "w******" 
Future: A hit single; faking his own death to escape Nikkki

Posted: 19th, August 2006 | In: Celebrities Comment | TrackBack | Permalink