Anorak News | Michael Jackson’s No Dummy

Michael Jackson’s No Dummy

by | 15th, November 2006

“AGE has not yet caught up with Michael Jackson,” says the Mail. “Cosmetic surgery unfortunately has.”

As ever, readers are treated to a shot of Jackson’s face. And it is hard to put an age to the ensemble. The inky-black sunglasses that bravely sit on Jackson’s nose might be the oldest thing on show.

There is an entire cottage industry given over to gawping at Jackson’s face. And the Mail sees “scarring caused by numerous cosmetic operations on his nose”, deep “craters” on either sides of his nostrils” and the “stitched-on appearance of his hair”.

It’s pretty much the kind of face we’re used to seeing atop Jackson’s lithe body. Indeed, it’s no longer all that unusual a look.

Cosmetic surgery is all the rage in California, where Jackson has spent much of his life. In California, many people look as if they have faces made of putty. Over there it is we pasty Brits who get stared at and cause children to run screaming into their nanny’s magnificent, gravity-defying bosom.

Philip Green, the billionaire businesses tycoon, is one worldly-wise Britisher who is sensitive to Jackson’s needs.

Jackson is in London for a performance at the World Music Awards. And with time to kill he went along to Green’s Topshop store on London’s Oxford Street. It was midnight and the store had been opened specially for him.

Walking among the plastic dummies and assorted moulded mannequins, Jackson must have felt right at home. Squint at the yellowy strip lighting and it could be Beverly Hills.

Here was Jackson getting close to the beautiful people he is used to mingling with in deepest Los Angeles. They are supercilious, aloof and ageless. So too the mannequins.

The Star has a picture of Jackson blending in among his kind of people, and sees him browsing through the ladieswear section, menswear and accessories. The Sun sees him test lip-gloss, blusher and lacy bras and pants.

It is all quite normal. But this is “Wacko Jacko”, and what we need is moments of madness. Not genius. Madness.

So Jackson has spent £500,000 on hiring a London hotel, the five-star Hempel Hotel near Hyde Park.

No-one else is staying at the hotel while Jackson is in residence. Naturally enough, this means he will not be affronted by unsightly pale British flesh and bad teeth.

And this is Jackson, who as the Mirror reports, before going to see the mannequins in Topshop took a pilgrimage to Madame Tussaud’s.

Our guess is that Jackson was keen to be reconnected with his waxy kind of people. And avoid those British freaks…

Posted: 15th, November 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink