Anorak News | I’m A Celebrity…Let Me At ‘Er

I’m A Celebrity…Let Me At ‘Er

by | 28th, November 2006

Saint Myleene Klass 

SHE’S great isn’t she?” asks Tony Parsons in the Mirror.

But this is a rhetorical question and Parsons hasn’t finished speaking. “She makes me wish I’d bought Hear’Say records when I had the chance.”

Parsons, who once wrote for the NME (New Musical Express), should know that records never die they just end up buried in a house clearance sale

Hear’Say’s debut single Pure and Simple is available in many record shops. Although it might be that Parsons, born in 1955, thinks he is too old for this brand of pop, and will look foolish and a little pervy as he shoves the disc down his cardigan and slinks away.

Of course, in truth, time is on Parson’s and if challenged he can pass off his weakness for reality TV pop with an ironic “It’s for the Christmas party” shrug.

But Parsons doesn’t even want the whole of Hear’Say – he just wants the bits with Myleene Klass on them.

The Mirror’s man peering through the jungle foliage has been watching Myleene in the I’m A Celebrity… clearing.

Myleene has stood by her boyfriend who has just been served with an 18-month suspended jail sentence for being caught with £1,000 worth of heroin.

“The real question is: when Myleene gets out of the bush, should she be made a saint?”

And while Myleene signs Parson’s record collection, and if she can wear her saintly white bikini while so doing then all well and good, Parsons moves on still more pressing matters.

“I have always been a fan of Itsu,” says he, then reminding readers who may have overlooked the details that this is the London eatery where former KGB operative Alexander Litvinenko “probably” ate Polonion-210, “a substance 250billion times more deadly than cyanide”.

Parsons says the food at his eatery passes by on a conveyor belt like in a Bruce Forsythe gameshow – raw fish, rice, cuddly toy, radioactive poison (Didn’t they do well!).

Parson often eats at Itsu and is “disturbed to think I may have asked a KGB agent to pass the wasabi”.

Parsons adds: “So I find myself outraged about the murder of Alexander Litvinenko on a number of levels.”

It’s enough to put you off your dinner. Although not off Myleene, naturally…

Posted: 28th, November 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink