Anorak News | Santa Or Satan?

Santa Or Satan?

by | 11th, December 2006

SANTA or Satan?

He’s making a list and checking it twice. Gonna find out who’s naughty and nice… He sees you when you’re sleeping! He knows when you’re awake!

It is truly terrifying time of year. But the nightmarish childhood vision of a fat, bearded man with a forked tail watching your every move (yes, he saw that too) and getting into your bedroom, bypassing so much security, is no more.

While the BBC trails the holiday season with Christmas With The Devil, the track by “mock rockers” Spinal Tap (Lyrics: “There’s someone up the chimney and Satan is his name”), the Sun talks of goings on at Boldmere Junior School, Sutton Coldfield, West Midlands.

A supply teacher stands before class. She is telling the little ones they need not be afraid. Santa Claus is not real. He is a fantasy, a lie cooked up by parents and marketing types to fleece children of their very souls. Santa is no more real than a Bratz doll.

Says Miss: “You are old enough to know there is no Santa… If you ask your parents they will also say there is no such thing.”

But while the children sigh with relief and sob with gratitude, mums are outraged. One mum tells the Mirror: “I am upset because it has taken away a magic part of Christmas. A teacher should not have the right to do that.”

But magic does still exist. What of that guiding star, the virgin birth and – hey presto! – the baby who gets given a box of gold as a Christmas present?

Not enough, say the mums. And the teacher who dared speak the truth has had her contract terminated. She is, as the Mirror says, “Father ex-miss”.
Who she was is not reported, her name not revealed. But rumours are that she has a head covered in horns and breaths fire when she speaks.

You’d best be good lest she come to get you…

Posted: 11th, December 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink