30 Carrot-Plated

HAYLEY Davison, a “wacky student”, wants to be as orange as David Dickinson.

For those of you not au fait with daytime TV (and we are sorry for that), Dickinson is the whipped haired wonder, the real life Lovejoy who fronts antiques programmes.

Dickinson’s claims to fame are using the phrase “Cheap as chips”, the aforesaid hair and having skin the colour and very possibly the texture or stained mahogany.

And Dickinson’s patina has caught the eye of Hayley Davison.

Having been labelled “whacky” in print – a euphemism as damaging as your partner calling you “cuddly” – Hayley is ready to face her future. And her future is, naturally, orange.

Hayley is preparing to eat carrots at every meal for the next 30 days.

Hayley’s diet is in response to an argument she had with her student housemates. Peculiarly, this row was not about who does the washing up, who pebbled dashed the toilet or who smells worse, but if you can turn orange by eating carrots.

Anorak knows that you can. As does the Star, which makes mention of the condition carotenemia, when the skin turns orange.

But Hayley’s six housemates in Benwell, Newcastle, do not believe. “I was laughed at and nobody believed me,” says Hayley. “I hope those who laughed feel very silly.” And surely they will when Hayley turns orange and begins to glow like the sun. How can the last laugh belong to anyone but her?

Hayley can teach her housemates much.

And we hope that if David Dickinson is looking in, he takes note. A glass of carrot juice for breakfast, lunch and dinner will give David that all year round gloss with no need for varnish and sun.

And if he can pass the message on to Dale Winton, “Marmalade” Kat Deeley, the atomic Satsuma that is Judith Chalmers, Nancy Dell’Olio, Jodie Marsh, Jordan and Robert Kilroy-Silk then so much the better…

Posted: 10th, January 2007 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink