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Lust In Space

by | 7th, February 2007

“SHUTTLE astronaut wore nappy in bizarre mission to kidnap love rival.”

The Express’s introduces the “astronaut avenger”. Named Captain Lisa Nowak, this space ranger can be seen in her orange flight suit.

Nowak’s career was “high-flying”. She was cool under pressure. The mother of three was on the up and up and up and up.

And then she met married Space Shuttle pilot Commander William Oefelein. She is said to have become “obsessed” by him. She grew angry when she believed he was seeing US air Force engineer Colleen Shipman.

Armed with a ball bearing gun, pepper spray and knife, a disguised Nowak went to confront her love rival. She drove 1,000 miles from her home in Texas to Orlando, Florida.

And she did this while wearing a nappy.

This is the Sun’s “ASTRONUT”, the woman who dives now just 900 miles. She caught up with Shipman, who was in her car. Nowak tapped on the glass. Shipman wound down her car window. Nowak launched the pepper spray.

But before anything more could be said or done, Shipman sped off and alerted the police.

Nowak was arrested. She was charged with attempted murder. She is now in jail awaiting justice to be done.

This is the Mail and Star’s “Lust in space”, the story of love and jealousy. And nappies.

The Mail says Nowak wore a nappy to save herself from having to stop for the toilet as she drove across five states.

And this is entirely in keeping with her training. We learn that astronauts wear nappies during launches and landings.

It might just be that Nowak has not destroyed just her own life and carer but also the image of the fearless and intrepid space traveller.

There he is. In his nappy.



Posted: 7th, February 2007 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink