Anorak News | Not On His Nelly – Gazza Upsets Furtado

Not On His Nelly – Gazza Upsets Furtado

by | 23rd, February 2007

not-on-his-nelly-gazza-upsets-furtado.jpgPAUL Gascoigne is in West End club Mo*vida. So too is Nelly Furtado.

There eyes meet. “Who is that idiot?” asks Nelly.

He is, of course, Paul ‘Gazza’ Gascoigne, the man who was one the best footballer in Britain. Not that many would expect, Nelly, a Canadian to know that.

And Gazza returns the compliment. An onlooker hears him inquire: “Who the fuck is Nelly? Like I give a fuck it’s his party.”

The onlooker says Gazza punctuated this outburst by falling into Nelly’s table and knocking glasses off it.

As Gazza is encouraged to the exit, he is heard asking: “Who the fuck is Nelly. Who is he?”

Indeed, dear readers. It shocks us too to learn that Nelly Furtado, that vision of brunette, perky loveliness is a man.

But Gazza, who famously sported breasts, is uniquely placed to spot the difference.

And he is trained. As the Star reports, Gazza is making ready to have lessons from the SAS. Gazza is to star in a film in which he plays a survivor battling to save the human race from alien invasion. And the SAS will teach him how to fire a gun.

“Maybe this will be the start for me,” says Gazza of the film entitled Final Run. “Who knows where it will go?”

For sure. If a short, cross-dressing Canadian called Nelly can make it in showbiz then why not Gazza?

Posted: 23rd, February 2007 | In: Tabloids Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink