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Artful Dodgers & Salad Dodgers

by | 13th, March 2007

artful-dodger.jpgWITH no fat kid looming into view, the papers spot a miscreant.

“Banned from going out after 9pm to 6am, possessing a knife, possessing a screwdriver, throwing stones, throwing eggs, possessing drugs, possessing a bong, possessing drugs paraphernalia, possessing alcohol and being drunk..AND HE’S 10,” runs the Mirror’s headline.

There is much Lewis Green cannot do. But on a more positive note Lewis in thin. The hope is that confined to quarters and unable to engage in some of his energetic activities, Lewis does not turn to comfort eating and lard.

Lewis has three convictions for burglary, possessing a knife and causing criminal damage. He nicks money, mobile phones and ciggies from his mum Stephanie (weight unspecified) and dad Derek (likewise).

And now Lewis is in possession of an anti-social behaviour order, one of the dwindling list of items he is allowed to keep.

More of “The terror aged ten” in the Mail. Lewis, dressed in regulation hooded leisure ware, is said to have been excluded from “several” schools.

Up before the Beak, Judge Nalla Lawrence, at Barnsley Magistrates Court, Lewis awaits his fate.

Mum speaks up. “Since he was put on an anger management drug three months ago he has not go into any trouble… Local people have even been asking me where he is, he has changed that much,” says he.

She pleads for clemency: “This Asbo could lead to him being dragged out by the older kids who have led him into trouble.”

But the ruling is made. Lewis is awarded an Asbo. Says the dispenser of justice: “The purpose of the order is to protect persons, not necessarily to punish Lewis.”

But Lewis has been punished. He has been “named and shamed”, says the Mail. His face is in the papers.

See where stealing sweets and verbally abusing a community police officer get you? Into the national press, that’s where.

That’ll learn him…



Posted: 13th, March 2007 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink